Cross your fingers, you’re a fraud.

So I don’t know who has any interest in actually reading this, but I’ve been dealing with some issues for the last week or so, and writing has always calmed me.So I’m kinda directing this toward the people causing me stress right now. So yeah, nothing personal if I get a little vicious with the “yous” and such.

Basically, what I wanted to point out is that honesty, isn’t just telling the truth. Sure, that is the most basic and simplest form of honesty. However, there are so many ways people cross that line.

Lately I’ve been dealing with someone who takes the truth, but manipulates the words. So technically, they’re kind of speaking honestly. But really, they’re speaking their own type of honesty. Manipulating the words to get the effect you desire is dishonesty. Plain and simple. It’s not fair to make things so far more tragic, and make yourself sound far more shiny than the real truth. I don’t care what you tell yourself, taking a situation and twisting it to fit your own needs is not being real. It would be own thing if you were trying to protect someone, and even then it’s a gray area, but when you’re causing drama because of it it just doesn’t sit well. I know why you’d do it, it’s for attention. All eyes on you, darling.

And I know what I’m talking about. I’m an awful liar, but I’m fantastic at twisting words. But the difference between you and me, is that I value honesty. And I’m not desperate for attention. I make no front that I’m perfect, I wear my flaws like badges of honor. Simply because I want people to get to know me for who I am, flaws and all. And putting up this facade is only going to backfire on you later, cause you can’t wear a mask forever. Not only will it wear on you, you know, should you have a soul, but there will be those who see through it and break it for others. You can’t truly know someone when you don’t let them get to know you. When you weave so much fake in with the real, it becomes to blurred, and how are they suppose to trust whats real?

Like I said, I don’t pretend to be perfect. And I don’t like to judge people until I really know them, but goodness knows you’re making it very difficult. I don’t care who you’ve got wrapped up in you. I don’t get caught that easily, sorry darling, I’m just not that trusting. Why you choose to make such a scene and post all that shit, is beyond me. I hate to break it too you, but hardly anyone cares! Those who comment are most likely regurgitating off of a list of insincere responses. Just cause it seems like the right thing to do. Which sucks cause they’re playing right into your hand, by simply giving you the attention you crave. It’s a vicious cycle. That’s why I’m posting this here, where you will never find it. Cause I need an outlet, but I won’t give you the satisfaction. Plus, you’re a wall. It wouldn’t matter what I said, or how much sense I make, you’ve built a barricade against what you don’t like and don’t want to hear.

You’ve done nothing to remotely earn my trust. You’ve done a lot to make me second guess your moral compass. And yet some ignore your inconsistencies, and choose ignorance. That is just frustrating, but I’m out. I won’t continue to put myself in the middle of your circus. I gave it one shot, to warn them. To let them know they should find things out for themselves. I said my piece, I pointed out your mistakes, and I did it in the nicest, most polite, logical, and non-judgmental way I could. That’s all I will give them. If they choose naivety, that’s not my problem. One day, it’ll be yours. But hey, I did try.

Continue with your charade, continue to dance around honesty, continue to build yourself up as a fraud. It doesn’t really matter, I don’t buy it. There are a number of people with me who don’t buy it. Actually darling, believe it or not, I’m the nice one. The others, they think even less of you. They say worse. They don’t give you as much credit.

And if what you’re doing you find okay, or you believe to be honesty. I’d feel sorry for you.

Actually not really. I’d probably feel a little more sickened. Just sayin.

I’m sure I could sit and type things out for longer, think of plenty more points to make and things to say, but I’ll leave it here. I, am not going to do shit. I will call you on your bull if you try that shit, but I will not go out of my way to fight a pointless battle. I just don’t find you worth it. And I don’t mean that as harsh as it sounds. You wouldn’t know this, but I’m pretty peaceful and easy going. I won’t make a mess I don’t intend on cleaning up. And I feel no need to clean up after you. End of story.

Well, since I’m feeling wordy tonight I should probably work on my book(s) and be productive. So in closing;

Try to be as honest as possible, listen to All Eyes On You by Mansions, and clothes smell awesome right out of the dryer.


Laney Bugs.

Mic Check.

So I got this shiny new tumblr account a few months ago, but this is the first time I’m taking it out of the box. That’s just how I roll…

So Miss Kristina, here is something for you to read. How I spent my Warped Tour-

Well I spent my first day of Warped Tour working. Handing out stickers and trying to get people to come by our booth. Wielding my charming personality (more like awkward) and witty sense of humor (more like sarcastic) to persuade people to walk away from the talented bands rocking the ears off of those standing close to hear the rumble out of the speakers, and design a t-shirt or sign up for give-a-ways. But then again, I had the power of stickers on my side…

So day two! This one I actually attended. The day started with being singled out by a band boy for my Mayday Parade t-shirt. But it was a decent band so it was cool. Then we scalped the extra ticket we had, and the dude and his friend had to share a shirt coming in the gate. Apparently you have to wear a shirt to enter, but can promptly remove it once on the other side o the fence. I’d just chugged some water and got the layout of the place, as well as the all important set times, when I noticed something missing.

My phone. Can you say, damn?

I happen to be the only one with a clean record when it comes to phones. My mother and brother can go through 5 cells a year. My mother has this habit of her phones “committing suicide”, they tend to “jump” into toilets, puddles, cell phone cracking concrete…etc. My brother? Huh..well I’m not entirely sure what he does to his phones. One day you’ll call him and his phone no longer works, or he lost it. Point is, my phones don’t have violent endings and I haven’t lost one yet. Until Warped.

So of course I’m thinking, fuck that phone is gone. I had my mom (hell yes, I went to Warped Tour with my mommy, she’s awesome.) call me, just in case. No answer. Shocking, eh? So we carry on watching Breathe Electric, who is really good live, and then my moms phone rings. And it’s my phone calling her.

I don’t know if it was the Glee ring tone (Okay, Don’t rain on my freaking parade. I will not be ashamed of my ring tone). Or my mommy calling on the caller id. Or the fact that he probably had a better phone than I do…

But I am so freaking grateful that he gave me back my phone. That’s golden. And I know he wasn’t expecting me (piercings, not 12.), but hey, can’t judge someone from their phone. =)

Lets see…the rest of the day was sweet. We got to see every band we wanted to check out. I got some new music. And bracelets. The crowd surfers and mosh pits were insane. I have to give props to the people at the Bring Me The Horizon set who did the wall of death. That was both frightening and entertaining. I hope no one got blood on their new t-shirts. I saw some band boys, and band girls, around but I didn’t go up to them. I’m bad with first impressions. So I tend to leave people alone. We stayed til the last band, and got herded by the event staff, and while exiting we ran into the What Happened In Vegas dudes. I found out they played the day I worked, but they’re nice. I’ve listened to them for like a year, I think. But I’ve never seen them play. Oh well, another tour, another time.

My big brother is at Warped Tour today, so I’m hoping to hear from him soo and he can fill me in on how sick his day was.

Til next time, who knows what I’ll type about then.


Laney Bugs.

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